Ephesians 2:10
For we are God's masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.
Who will love me for me
Not for what I have done or what I will become
Who will love me for me
Cause nobody has shown me what love
What love really means
I will love you for you
Not for what you have done or what you will become
I will love you for you
I will give you the love
The love that you never knew
Love Me by JJ Heller
Love. What does love really mean? Can I truly grasp it? Maybe I should pray that I will understand the concept of love.
Lately it seems I have been longing for love. Longing for love from anyone who would offer it to me. I think I've been looking for it in all the wrong places? I mean why would I give my all to something ie facebook or someone ie a boy when Jesus has this love to offer me. This love that is so much greater than the love that anything or anyone can offer. I don't know why I rush into these situations out of desperation when I am left feeling empty time and time again. The truth is nothing could ever fill the void in my heart like Jesus does. So the question lingers, why is it that I am neglecting my first love? Why is he at the bottom of my priority list?
I have this fear that I will walk away from my faith. Recently when I go to church or fellowship it's like once I'm sitting there I just want to bust out of the doors. It's like what Jeremy said maybe my soul is battling with my flesh. The thing that freaks me out the most is that it was never like that. I used to be so excited to go to fellowship. Like I would drop everything if I could go to fellowship. Maybe it's my fault, after all I've been letting the things of this world grasp my attention so long that I have lost sight of my first love. Maybe I have forgotten what it was like to just be submerged in God's love when my focus was on him and only him.
My pastor brought up this thing the other day. What if God takes away the things in my life that take my attention away from him? Then it hit me. Will it really take something drastic like another heartbreak to get my focus on God again? Why not prevent that by spending time with him now? Why not make time for him now before he disciplines me. I may not feel like doing what I've wanted to do but like I was taught I don't worship by feeling it's all about faith. So I am going to push through these trials. I may be taking baby steps but at least I will be making progress.
I am so glad that we are doing bible study every other day now. I have more friends to keep me accountable. I have more people that I can pray with and for. Oh and they can pray for me too. I praise God for these people who will pick me up when I fall on my face and run the race of faith with me.
No apologies
For who I'm meant to be
The only thing that matters is
I am free
When I am overwhelmed
Holding pieces of my heart
When I feel my world
Start to fall apart
To the cross I run
Holding high my chains undone
Now I am finally free
Free to be what I've become
Undone
Undone by Mercy Me
